Not So Mighty...

I'm feeling a little less mighty this weekend.

The other night, I woke up to find myself in the hallway outside my apartment, barefoot and wearing only t-shirt and shorts, and locked out.

I haven't walked in my sleep since I was five, and it scared the hell out of me.

Apartment life being relatively anonymous, I don't know any of my neighbours well enough to go banging on their door at three in the morning, so I wandered around the building to see if anyone else was about.

I encountered one couple, coming home from somewhere, explained my situation and asked if I could use their phone to call my father, who keeps a spare set of keys at his house. They declined to assist. Disappointing.

Returning to my floor, I decided the only thing I could do was to try and get some sleep.
There's a security patrol that's supposed to come through the building three times a night; I figured the patrolman would help me get sorted, so I sat in front of my door waiting for him to arrive, nodding off after a while.

When he did arrive, the conversation went like this:

Security Guy: "You okay?"

Me: "What? Yeah, I think so."

Him: "What happened?"

Me: "I think I was sleepwalking. I woke up out here and I can't get back in. Can I use your phone to call my father? He has a spare key."

Him: "I don't have a phone, sorry. Have a good night."

And off he went, leaving me there. Bastard.

As far as I know, that was his only patrol that night, because I didn't see him again.

Time passed, and as the sun came up, the building began to come to life. It seemed everyone sets their alarm for 0700, because I was hearing beeps and buzzes coming from several apartments. Finally, at about 0730, the door across the hall opened and my neighbour came out on his way to work. I explained what had happened and he was only too happy to lend me his phone.

I managed to call my dad, who got across town in record time with my keys (and a big grin on his face) and I was never so happy to see anyone in my life.

He joked that I'd have to get another key made and wear it on a chain around my neck. That scared me as much as having spent the night in the hallway. What if I do it again?

As far as I know, there's no history of this kind of thing in my family, and my previous nocturnal perambulation happened nearly forty years ago, so I'm hoping it's a one-off.

I stayed out of work Friday, exhausted, and slept from the time my father left until about lunchtime.

It's the closest to being homeless that I can imagine - it's a sobering thought to consider that only an inch and a half of door separated me from warmth and security, and I was helpless to do anything about it.

The reactions of people I approached for assistance also surprised me. I've always believed that people are basically decent and will come to the aid of a neighbour without needing to be asked.

Maybe I'm just naive, but I'd like to be able to keep believing that...


Lee said…
Dude that's horrible how people didn't help.

Hope it doesn't happen again.
Thanks man - so do I.

My dad says I should wear a key on a chain around my neck just in case - I know he was joking, but all the same...

The bit that's pissing me off is that the security guy just left me sitting there - what the f**k am I paying him for if that's what I can expect?

I think I'll be having a chat with the management company tomorrow...
Becca said…
Oh my gosh that is a scary thought. My heart was racing just reading about the experience! I hope it doesn't happen again!

And yeah what's the point of having the security guy if he can't help you!
Scary's right, and I hope it doesn't happen again as well...

As for the security guard, we got on to his company and demanded an explanation. I should hear something tomorrow.

Now all I have to do is get a spare key made and duct tape it to something.

Just in case, you understand...
That's terrible! I'd hate to have that fear. I've never sleepwalked; sleeptalked a lot, sleep-headbutted my girlfriend (she still hasn't forgiven that one), but never walked in my sleep. As a child, my brother would occasionally walk downstairs in his sleep and attempt to 'go toilet'. My parents would hurredly rush him back upstairs before he had a chance to start.
Yeah - like I said, not since I was five...

And 'sleep-headbutting'?

As Fr. Dougal Maguire might say, "That's just mad, Ted..."
Therin of Andor said…
A security guard without a mobile phone? Hilarious!

I'm amazed he didn't try to march you out of the building and into the cold night air.

So what service was he actually doing that had anything to do with keeping the building "secure"?

Just stumbled across your blog and loving it!

Not at the time, trust me...

The security guard, when questioned, 'remembered things differently' stating I appeared disoriented and he didn't recall my asking for a phone.

Of course I was disoriented - I was sleeping in my doorway and he woke me up! And even if he was right (which he wasn't, the lying toad), he never even offered assistance, which should have been his first action...

Anyway, welcome to the blog - sorry it's kind of tailed off lately but I hope to have a bit more to post in the weeks to come...

PJ said…
That's worrying. And it's a shameful comment on our society that no one wanted to help you.
PJ - Yep, it's like I had my invisibility turned on or something (more of which in a later post).

But I can laugh about it now, albeit nervously...